kickin' off "animals in cones!"

Alright, it's official! Animal in Cones! has officially begun! I was first approaching this project as I normally do things... nothing will reach the public's eye until the entire job is complete. Yesterday I realized that this project may very well never be complete, seeing as there are countless animals subject to coning in the world. So... I've made the very difficult decision to post these as I complete each separate one.
How does this affect you, you ask? Well... it makes these more accessible in a timely fashion. And, what are stationery connoisseurs, if not obsessed with timely fashion.

Speaking of obsession... my obsession for the day: people who are obsessed with cupcakes.
Alternate obsession of the day: the word obsession.

By the way... have you read grin and bear it yet?
do. www.grin-bear-it.blogspot.com

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Now playing: The Builders And The Butchers - In The Branches
via FoxyTunes

for real this time...

So, I may have completely lied last time when I stated I'd be getting back in the saddle. The horse was too high, or my legs were too short... or the cup was kind of half emptyish but full at the same time. Optimism. Pessimism. Laziness.
I'm a little less lazy these days, but pretty busy. I've begun playing music again. Working on a bunch of new ideas in my head. Writing for a music website. Being social. Looking for paying jobs... Trying to get my life together is tough! In the midst of all of this, I actually have been working on a new series of cards I'm very excited about. It's the first time I've had a very comprehensive theme, that lends itself to either single cards or some sort of boxed set. This could be the breakthrough you're all so anxiously awaiting for me to make. I hope to make you all (as opposed to just my mother) very proud.
I have been working on this project in bars mostly, so it's productive, but slow.
-Keep your eyes peeled for "animals in cones"
-Come see the creative process and have a drink with me
-Support the arts and buy one of my old designs
-Support the arts and buy something from one of the artists set up in Union Square that Mayor Bloomberg is trying to oppress
-Call your mother and tell her you love her
-Write a list of things for people to do

I soon hope to have "animals in cones" in a facebook picture album near you! Don't miss the world premiere.


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Now playing: Band Of Horses - Marry Song
via FoxyTunes

some time off/back in the saddle

^quick sketch of the day


Holy blog!! It's been a long time since I've written anything. Well, here's why...

I've been sick. A pretty bad cold. Nothing serious, but it's left me wanting to do nothing but lay in bed watching movies. Thinking seemed like the least appealing thing in the world, and to my surprise... writing a blog actually requires thinking! Who would've thought!?
I've been stressed out. Not only am I trying to figure out some direction in my life, but financial situations have just plain sucked for me lately. I don't make much money at my job. Most of my money goes to rent and food. Besides this, Sallie Mae has been haunting my every move like an ex-girlfriend that thinks you owe her an apology for something.
Illness and stress equal not only a lack of writing a blog, but a lack of creativity all around.

I've started to feel physically better in the last couple of days. I've started to grasp my financial situation in a sensible manner. All in all, I'm upset that these things drained my creativity. I feel nothing should ever have that kind of impact on something important to me. While struggling with this feeling, I was on the subway yesterday, and saw some girls writing in a greeting card. I happened to catch a glimpse at the front: a poorly done comic scene of a beach, with a few fat people in thongs. And then, tragically, I saw the inner "greeting": Two thongs don't make a right.
Two thongs don't make a right?! Just reading that seriously lit a fire under my ass. That is one of the lamest attempts at humor I have ever seen.

It's officially time for me to get back on the saddle. Keep your eyes peeled. I'll be riding my horse to a fucked up, under-represented comical situation near you!

p.s.
as far as the "quick sketch of the day" goes; I would love to get a poll on whether it should say "congratulations" or "sorry".



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Now playing: Gil Scott-Heron - Where Did The Night Go
via FoxyTunes

confused holiday. stereotypical behavior

St. Patrick's Day. In my title I mention stereotypical behavior; I am not referring to the Irish. It is stereotypical of people to celebrate another culture in a way that shows no sense of comprehension.
St. Patrick's Day. When everyone decides they are going to be "Irish" for a day by getting as drunk and rowdy as possible. While I'll agree that this is a typically true stereotype, it does not bode well to attempt to act like that for one night and call it a celebration. When an entire culture acts in this manner in general... well, it's kind of badass. When you try to recreate that donning your shiny green hat... well, you're a douche bag.
St. Patrick's Day in general is a confused holiday... it's an "Irish" celebration, yet really started in America. There is a lot of paganism surrounding this Catholic steeped holiday (see: leprechaun). And although St. Patrick is Ireland's patron saint, not that much is even known about him.

I can attest that there are some positive aspects. Certain cities, like New York (which to my knowledge was one of the first cities to hold a parade) does still have a very respectable parade celebrating the Irish.
It keeps me from going to a bar, as I will not set foot in one on this day.
I think that's the only two positive things...

Sorry for the incredible lack of humor in this post... at least a possible card idea would be to illustrate a bunch of people, clearly not Irish, drinking heavily or passed out. "Happy St. Patrick's Day!"
Or... an Irish cop beating a minority mercilessly (I can stereotype my own people, right?).

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Now playing: Drive-By Truckers - 01 - Daddy Learned To Fly
via FoxyTunes

a comic, a card, a chinese girl

Saturday night.
New York City.
Severe rain storm.
What to do, what to do? Well... karaoke in a seedy Chinatown bar, of course!

That's right, some friends and I decided it was time for our occasional (and increasingly often) karaoke outing. The only place we like to go to do this is in a bar in Chinatown... it's shady, it's out of the way, it's always a weird crowd and I'm fascinated with a bartender that I should have absolutely no contact with... so in other words, it's perfect!

Seeing as the drinks are more expensive there than at any bar I frequent, I've become adept to either getting very, very drunk beforehand (see: my birthday two years ago) or bringing a flask full of cheap bourbon. Either way, I seem to always a)make a fool of myself or b)create a very awkward atmosphere (usually with the help of a specific friend).

A month ago, when there during an unusually busy night, I being both drunk upon arrival and having a flask became utterly fixated on the attractive Chinese bartender. She quickly sized up the situation and weaseled me into buying numerous drinks for both herself and I. She's good... I almost never fall for that trick. This time around, I made sure to completely avoid her siren-like abilities. Essentially, I avoided her completely, aside from the occasional dirty look.

So, why on earth do I bring this up, and speak of it on my blog? Sunday morning, while revisiting the night before, I realized that I need to continue working on a comic strip I started on a few months back. It's about a country bear, trying to make it in "Big City", and is of course based on my life... mainly the unsuccessful attempts at picking up the ladies. The whole karaoke scene is exactly the situation I was trying to portray. This bear is just an idiot in social situations.
So, I'm going to be hard at work, and will get some stuff online for your enjoyment as soon as I can! Keep yer ears and eyes open for "grin and bear it" starring bearly!!

More specific to What The Cluck... I did remember somewhere in a drunken haze, between singing I Want You To Want Me and Hank Williams' Lovesick Blues that the last time I was drunk with these friends I came up with a really, really good card idea.
The message is: it's not cheating if you believe in polygamy
I'm very excited to work on this one.

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Now playing: Bap Kennedy - Unforgiven
via FoxyTunes

the new routine

So, I'm trying to follow a new routine. I'm somewhat forced to do this as a result of my shift in work schedule...
I'm attempting to exercise. I'm attempting to eat better. I'm attempting to drink less. I (hopefully one of these damn days) attempting to either stop smoking or smoke a shit-load less. I'm trying to spend more time with the people I care about.

This has all spurred from the fact that I just feel good. I feel great. I'm feeling happy, confident, creative. I'm currently listening to one of my favorite albums from the last ten years that I have not had access to in about 6 years. It's a real "blast-from-the-past".

That's what's going on with me... but this blog is much less about the asshole behind the cards; way more about the cards/process itself.

So, how does this shift affect What The Cluck?
Aside from just feeling more focused and creative.... if a lazy, beer-bellied man attempting to exercise isn't funny, I don't know what is.


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Now playing: Queens of the Stone Age - Better Living Through Chemistry
via FoxyTunes

bonus! card idea of the day...

For some reason, I just thought of the ridiculous phrase "an ass that just won't quit" (and by "some reason", I mean to say I was just outside in the spring-like weather... you do the math).

Anyway, I LOVE this phrase for the sheer absurdity of it, and am sure it would make a great card.
I'll be thinking about how to create this one, but would also really like to hear some suggestions.

Thanks ya'll!